Never would i imagine all these will happen.. if i could, able to tune back.. i wished i hadnt said all those harsh words that landed u up today..will god pls bless everything will be over soon.. pls enlighten me what to do on next step.. giving up wasnt easy for me..

Infact u r really a nice person to be with.. but somehow.. i, myself cant control my temper over small argue.. everytime we quarrel.. i knew u would have look up on my blog.. and u asked me.. why do i have to post it up and let others view? Typing and talking is totally different in way of expression oneself.. somehow.. i find typing can really dig up my inner feelings..
I felt guilty now.. and yes i'm.. i wanted to make it up... but i dont know where to start..
I think i already overwrite you as a boyfriend.. i dint gave enough ego to u..
Simple things also i will comments.. its tiring to u.. and why..
u know how many WHY are in my head spinning now.. i got no enough sleep because of this matter.. i scared this and that.. and scare that your history will repeat.. and i duno how to answer to ur closest ones should there be any bad things happens.

i hate myself.. i told u i'm not fit to be in relationship at all.. if not i wouldnt have been so single in past 1 yr.. even those pple were just a passerby in this past 1 yr.. i finally get to understand myself... what is this so-called NOT FIT TO BE IN RELATIONSHIP..

this is how it goes.. when a person i loves had a past issue bout girls and stuffs.. i tends to put on my guards always.. is not that i dont believe.. but i cant believe.. i cant force myself to believe.. this is me.. i felt betrayal everywhere.. especially in relationship.. i believe.. married can be divorce.. attached can be flirty to others too..
when i never flirt with other guys.. i expect the same from you too...
u kept telling me that u never did anything wrong despite is just a sms.. but u deleted.. damn.. this is already PAST.. and yet this is still dangling in my mind..
I say i forgive.. but i cant forget.. this sentence is so true that really describes..